So I haven't posted anything in almost a week. Not because I didn't want to, but because I have been super busy having a little personal meltdown about starting school again and other trivial things. I woke up the other morning with a case of social anxiety disorder, for real. It was ridiculous. There are a few blogs that I read on a regular basis and most of those bloggers have important things to do in life, or have kids... but I really feel like I have no excuse for being stressed, which stresses me out!
I am only going back to school and I don't know why I am so nervous about it! I am excited to start nursing school and excited to start my life towards a new career, but I am letting this "overwhelmed" feeling get to me. When I get stressed I tend to "shut down" so to speak. I am normally a planner and prety organized and well prepared for my day, but when I get stressed I forget things, misplace items, procrastinate, stress eat and never answer the phone.
So here's how the first day of school went thanks to my state of mind:
Not so good:
1. Stayed in bed for twenty extra minutes
2. Forgot to feed the dogs and didnt realize it until halfway to school
3. Turned the wrong way at an intersection on the way to school which in morning traffic is timing suicide
4. Went to the side of the parking deck where the entrance was closed (of course)... there were 8 minutes left until class started at this point.
5. Tripped on the way off the elevator while pretending to text message on my cell phone because I get uncomfortable in elevators crowded with skinny, tan, freshman college girls- who knew?
6. Ate at Wendy's for lunch = guilt for days, then ate dessert after dinner and didn't go to the gym= total failure of a day
7. Didn't fold laundry or unload the dishwasher when I got home and instead watched re-runs of Wifeswap on TV
8. Didn't buy books yet
On a good note:
1. All my professors seem super helpful and are fluent in English.
2. I got handed a flyer for rush, which was humorous.
3. Three girls behind me in class were whispering about my wedding ring being pretty. Thank goodness for my eavesdroping skills coming in handy sometimes.
4. I already have a Bachelor's degree and don't have to take BS electives!
5. I DONT live in a dorm or have roomates.
6. I aced my psychology class pre-assessment test with a perfect 100- loving neuroanatomy and being obsessed with medical shows is not a waste of time after all .
7. I can legally drink- ha
8. I can get a free personal trainer from the KSU health center
Anyway, I am working my way out of my "funk" this week and am looking forward to class tommorrow. I am not so nervous anymore thank goodness and I'm not even the oldest one in all my classes! Ryan is being wonderfully supportive and hasn't lectured me once about the height of the clean laundry pile, which I appreciate. I am packing a lunch for tommorrow and even read ahead for chemistry. I can do this!
5 years ago
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