Never Alone

I have the day off today, and when I'm home by myself, I love to watch the doggies and spend time with them between their tightly scheduled napping periods. I was watching Doodle sleep and thinking about how I never feel really alone when she is around. It got me thinking about our history together and how important she is to me.

In July of 2004 I adopted "Doodle", also known as Abigail on a whim, on my lunchbreak from work. She was terrified of everything, 40 pounds underweight, abused, and in such bad shape that I though she was a chocolate lab- but she's black! Anyway, for the first two days that I had her (it was summer in Athens so I had my apt. to myself) I spent most of the time sitting on the floor with treats in my hand not making eye contact and trying to get her to come to me. She spent most of her time in the corner, shaking. After a week or so, she started to really come around and would follow me throughout the apt. but not really get close. I thought for a few days about finding her a home because I thought she would never love me. I decided to try some pretty intense socialization so I took her everywhere with me, which is totally possible in Athens and something I miss! I wanted her to think of me as her "pack leader". Anyway, I took her for a walk at the Intermural fields/trails at UGA and ran into an older lady with an old German Shepherd. She asked me about Doodle and I told her the story and that I was a little depressed because she seemed to tolerate me, but not really love me. She told me all her Shepherds were rescues and not to give up. She said the secret was to sit next to them and pull their face close and whisper in their ear that you will always love them and will never let them be homeless again. A little cooky, yes. The dog psychologist (yes they have those in Athens) I took her to said that she felt very uncomfortable with close human contact and that getting in her face was NOT what I should do. But I did exactly that. I whispered to her every day and in about two days, the following went to constant contact. No matter where I walked, sat, or laid, she always seemed to be there next to me, leaning on me or pressing her body against mine. I was thrilled because she loved me, and she needed me, and I could give her everything she needed. My maternal instinct is strong, but my dogs are the only babies I want to nurture at this time in my life so it worked for both of us. She began to blossom and her personality came out. The dog that NEVER made a sound for the first two months I had her started to "talk" to me when she wanted something. She was gaining weight and her coat was coming in a glossy black. I learned that she loved to go in the car and go swimming at the lake and had little to no interest in fetching anything, ever. She started to play with the plethora of toys I bought her instead of just looking at them and she "squeaked" her days away at my feet with her toy pig in her mouth. She developed an aversion to having doors closed in between us and laid on the bath mat when I showered, which she still does, and she saw my "potty" time as the perfect opportunity to get petted and lean on me. I was worried that she might get a little too attached and develop some separation anxiety issues, so I made sure not to make a big deal when I left the apt. and I say the same exact thing to her everytime I leave the house. "Be back in a little while, be a good girl, I love you" She chewed up one shoe one time, but that was it. She learned about me leaving and I think her personality is probably and little like mine in that she enjoys some alone time.

When Ryan gave me Rylie Boo for Valentines Day in 2008, I was pumped because Doodle would have a friend to play with (she loves other dogs) and the exercise would help keep her young. Not to mention she was the cutest puppy known to mankind. Rylie Boo, being a poodle, is by nature an inquisitive, intelligent, and affectionate dog. She craves CONSTANT attention and because I am so used to having Doodle around, Rylie Boo picked up those same habits, only took them to the next level. Instead of waiting on the bath mat while I shower, she will jump IN the shower if I don't close the door quickly enough. She will jump IN my lap when I potty and unlike Doodle, who is happy to find a place to lay in the same room, Rylie Boo is not happy unless she is touching me or walking next to me at all times. If I get up off the couch to put a cup in the dishwasher, she comes all twelve steps with me. I have created a monster. I cannot do ANYTHING in the house alone or without what I call "poodle help".

I'm sure Ceasar Milan would tell me that I did this because I want to be needed and have a strong mothering instinct, and he's probably right, but I swear I didn't realize that I would never be able to walk down the stairs without feeling poodle hair brushing my ankles. So even though it's a little annoying to have a 90 pound lab and 11 pound poodle leaning against you and trying to jump in your lap if you have to pee, it's nice on days like this when I'm home alone or Ryan is out of town and we can just enjoy the quiet together. I'm thankful for that cooky lady's advice and I still whisper to Doodle almost every day that she will never be alone again either.

On a different note:
I'm a little scared about what I will do if human children are this needy! Moms out there, do you get to pee alone?