If you ever need a lesson in patience, try training a horse. If you have no patience and an inability to learn it, don't. I am NOT, by nature a patient person when it comes to traffic, people, phone calls, boiling water and preheating ovens and a myriad of other things, but I am extremely patient with horses and children. I think God knew that I needed to often learn these lessons in patience, and put horses in my life as part of that plan. My parents might tell you that ever letting me see the inside of a barn and feeling the soft muzzle of a horse was perhaps the biggest (financial) mistake they ever made, but I for one, think that horses have taught me much more than I could ever learn in the inside of a classroom, office, or even on a therapists couch.
When dealing with horses, you have to learn a "way" to conduct yourself that is often counter intuitive to our natural instincts as humans. For example, when threatened with bodily harm, humans most often resort to the "fetal" position to guard our internal organs. When sitting on the back of a bucking and bolting horse however, "fetal" is not a good choice- ask me how I know this :) Riders work for years to learn to sit up/back and not react to a frightened or naughty horse by leaning over and grabbing onto the saddle etc. when panicked. When a horse plunges into a fit of bucking, crow hopping etc. at a horse show, you will often hear a chorus of voices around the ring say in a low singing and soothing tone, sit up, sit up, whoaaaaaaa, hooooooo. It's a reflex to me now, but it's part of that education that you can't get anywhere else. You also have to learn to never raise your voice, scream etc. in the presence of a frightened or injured horse- esp. one with a rider still attached. Horse people have major issues with this because our emotions overcome us when something we love so (whether horse or human) much is in danger. To see a horse and rider pair crash and burn over a big cross country fence is not only disheartening, but just plain scary, trying not to "exclaim" in any way is almost impossible, but remaining calm, quiet and in control, will do far more to help the situation than to exacerbate it by acting "human".
Little things like this have changed and influenced the way I handle lots of situations, horse related or not. I once drove up on a wreck that had just happened, and this sweet lady got out of her car to help about the same time I did. As soon as she saw blood, she screamed and literally just started walking around in circles in the middle of a two lane road- helpless. I grabbed her arm, sat her on the curb and gave her an assignment- call 911, which she could barely accomplish- while I spoke to the bleeding driver and kept her company until help arrived. I was SURE in that moment, that my training with horses over the years has taught me to stay calm and quiet in those types of situations- and not freak out at the sight of blood. My adrenaline was pumping and physiologically, my hair stood on end and my body was actually shaking (like when you shiver from cold), but I could stay calm- and for that I am thankful.
Horses teach us how to think outside of ourselves- and not of ourselves and how to take responsibility for things other than ourselves and most of all- how to work- hard. They are not just a pet that we pat and love and take pictures of and throw food at, but a partner that we develop a strong bond of trust with and a relationship- a non-verbal relationship where the needs of both sides must be communicated and met. It's a wonderfully fulfilling challenge to develop a partnership with a horse and although it's tricky to understand if you haven't done it, it's worth the work.
So now to my point, the coolest thing about riding, and perhaps the most frustrating, is that you can ALWAYS learn more, and you can ALWAYS get better. Even Olympic gold medalists take lessons from other riders. Training a horse and developing that partnership is a long journey and there are always bumps in the road. Weather for one, has been putting a damper on a regular riding schedule this winter, and even though Jazz is an entirely different horse now than she was at this time last year, there is always more to be done. When I rode her Saturday, it was for the first time in almost three weeks- which is a lot of lost time! She was great, but a little poky and I could feel that her fitness level, as well as my own, had decreased. Things like transitions and rhythm that should perhaps now be second nature, were difficult, but she was very good and workmanlike and we had a nice ride! The three steps forward that I felt like we had taken around Christmas time (which I still need to write about), were still somewhat intact!
Today, was the two steps back. She was her usual self on the ground, friendly and curious, finding reasons to prance around in the cross ties. The ride started like any other- and she even stood for a moment for me at the mounting block- which is something we always struggle with (and that I am admittedly too lazy/impatient to spend time working on regularly). She is learning however, the meaning of "STAND" and I try to reward her for her good moments in it! We did a few minutes of walk and changed direction several times and worked on single loop serpentines as well as we could in a field with no dressage letters- i use piles of poop as markers :o and she was feeling relaxed and light in my hands. I love those moments when our upward transitions are complete with no change in the shape of her neck/back and her ears are split- one trained on me and one pricked forward while in my hands I feel that elasticity/lightness and yo-yo motion like the weight of two shampoo bottles in my hands. That- is our "correct" and we are getting those moments more often now. I used to struggle with just being interesting enough for her to even concentrate on me (the days of giraffe neck on a swivel are coming to an end) so this is big progress. All is well and I decide to get brave and work on canter transitions on a ~20m circle. My plan is this: stretchy but connected and relaxed trot circle, transition up at poop pile "A" without losing the connection and getting "grabby" into the canter (which I know is pretty much a shot in the dark, so I give myself a whole circle to settle into canter and get her back) the canter circle back to "A", then five strides to downward trot transition, then count of ten trot steps and back into canter, five strides, back down etc. until we are getting the hang of it and relaxing into the transitions.
So all is well on the trot circle, I am literally sitting to ask for the canter and BOOM she throws her entire body into the air- shoulders first- like taking a four foot jump from a standstill and then BOLTS while shortening her neck back and up (so theres nothing to WHOA with my hands because I've already got her ears in my face) and simultaneously crow-hopping as I try to sit deep and whoa her with my body. Out of the corner of my eye (this is during gallop/crow hop interlude) I see what caused this eruption- two men came out of the creek bed wearing bright orange reflective traffic vests and white hard hats (read- very visible to a horse) along our fenceline- where NO ONE ever is. I feel her back come up underneath me as the ground flies by and she lets a pretty decent buck out- which unseats me for a moment so I grab a fistful of mane and look up- it's that moment right before you eat dirt when you think to yourself - "shit- this is probably going to hurt and your eyes start looking for a good place to land"- but at the same time, my mind said "you are fine, just sit down and hold on"- and I did. I didn't fall off- but I almost did. For the first time in a long time.
So after her "moment", I walked her over to the men on the fence line and although she snorted her way allll the way over, acting all incensed about who they were and why the heck they were walking next to her pasture, once she got there- she promptly pops her head over the fence and nudges the man and starts to rub her face on him for a scratch- ho bag. I spoke to them and they said kudos for staying on and one of them asked if I race her...why do all non-horsey people assume all horses are racehorses?....although perhaps she did look a little like one in her first ten strides of pure BOLT. We went back to our circle to pick up where we left off and when I asked for the canter transition this time- she threw me another crow-hopping fit just for emphasis. I growled at her and made her do it three decent times- although she never settled into the canter at all- but I wanted to end the day on a good note with her NOT learning that she can be dramatic in order to get out of work. Sigh... two steps back.
I try not to take it personally, but sometimes we do when the animals we work so hard with/for seem uninterested and uncooperative- but thats just part of the training process and again, that patience thing. After I untacked her turned her out- she trotted off to the round bale and I did barn chores. Before I left I walked out into the pasture to pick up some trash I had seen out there earlier that blew off the road and she followed me over (normally she would just stay at the bale and watch me unless she suspected I had food of any sort) and I stopped and she put her big ole head on my shoulder and rubbed her face on me. I said "oh- are you apologizing?" and she twitched her lips on my jacket (grooming behavior- which she doesn't do often) and so I knew that was a "yes". I scratched her face and rubbed her ears and then she sauntered back off to the round bale. I needed that moment with her- and again, I was thankful that because of horses, I am slow to judge and quick to forgive- horses that is ;), but I'm working on humans too.
Me? Naughty? Never....
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